Talk your problems through
On the topic of the teacher who was <a href="http://www.ajarn.com/ajarn-guests/articles/being-fat-and-brown-skinned-in-thailand" title="ridiculed for being overweight">ridiculed for being overweight</a> - "Yeah, life ain't fair and the people of Thailand have some different values and ways of doing things than people in the USA have" Maturity epitomized there, ladies and gentleman.
I've been fortunate as far as my looks go in Thailand. I'm tall and fair-skinned. This is who I am. Back home people might say that I'm too fair- skinned. This bothered me when living back home sometimes. I wasn't doing anything wrong, but was made to feel like I was. Now I'm in Thailand it's the opposite. I'm complimented on looking fair. Now when I go home I simply don't care what people say about me being pasty.
I worked with an overweight guy before. The kids would often mention his weight. It was like they had turrets with words associated with overweight. It got him down and I felt bad for him. He wasn't the most confident or assertive fellow in the world, so I told him that he ever needs to chat, come and chat.
Talking about problems really helps. I told him that it wasn't personal and it was just kids being kids. If he wanted me to, I'd have a word with his class when they came to my class (I am a science teacher). I told the kids not to mention about his weight. It hurts his feelings and it's not nice nor polite. I told them that we're not to look down on anyone because of how they look. This is also my job as a teacher to have a safe and pleasant learning environment. This isn't an elitist farang idea, it's also a value shared by Thais. To think it wasn't would be to look down on the locals like "they don't know any better".
The kids were good. They respected me and understood my point. They liked the other teacher but simply didn't realize they were hurting his feelings. After all, they're kids and are still learning about life. He ended up leaving Thailand anyway, but I'd like to think he left Thailand a wiser and happier person from his experiences. I'd like to think more people offered him a kind or supportive word over simply telling him he's not cut out for Thailand.
When we have problems, it's always good to talk about them. Share experiences and know it's not only us. The wrong thing to do is to tell someone "shut up or go home". Adults talk and rationalize. We might not always agree, but we should always talk and share ideas, opinions and thoughts.
Good job with the website, Phil. I enjoy reading comments and seeing what other teachers in Thailand are up to. Their experiences (good or bad) all add to make it a great place to live and work.
Simon